Failure as Teacher
Failure is something we all encounter at some time or another. We often attempt to avoid failure by not taking any risks -- by always playing it safe. But what kind of a life would that result in?
Success is not achieved by avoiding failure -- I think true success comes from a lifestyle of faith-filled risk-taking. I've failed, even failed badly, at many things -- and it seems like God delights to teach through failure.
Here are some lessons I've learned from my misadventures. Oh, you don't need to fail to learn these lessons, but God has a way of impressing his ways of wisdom at moments when we get hit hardest.
Lesson #1: With God all failure is temporary
God delights in restoring things we've lost. It is scandalous, how God accepts us when we turn back to him. It's almost like he loves us more than the stuff we strive to do for him (!). Even when our failures are due to our own sin or poor choices, the moment we face up to the consequences and embrace God's discipline, he shifts from correcting us to restoring us.
The glory of the Father's grace is all the more highlighted in the full restoration of a repentant son. The prophets are replete with God's anger at Israel's sin, but they are always intermixed with God's promise to "restore their fortunes" if they would only turn and seek him with their whole hearts (Jer 29:10-14).
All failure is temporary, when we turn back to a God who delights in restoration.
Lesson #2: Failure reveals the true depth of your walk with God, and his walk with you.
God has the right to test us. God, in his sovereignty, allows things into our lives that reveal (to us) what is in our hearts. When we pass or fail the test we become aware of our real character -- not the puffed-up image we sometimes have of ourselves. We are "surprised" at the junk that rises to the surface -- especially when we face failure.
Gold is tested by fire so it's true worth can be seen.
I am always surprised by how God walks with me through my failure. While I am shocked at the shallowness of my walk with God (which was never a surprise to God), I am simultaneously astonished at his unwavering commitment to me. There is conviction and discipline, but it comes in the context of God's intense compassion, love and affirmation.
He never gives up on his people. Ever.
When I've lived out my worst nightmare and at the end of it I realize that God still wants to hang around me -- it does something deep in me. I now know God as the one who will never forsake me, even at my lowest, darkest moment -- and this has utterly destroyed a certain kind of fearfulness that I've walked around with for years. I think less of my goodness, and rest more in his.
Lesson #3: Failure reveals who your friends really are.
We are all taught that caring and loving is the Christian thing to do. When things are going well with our friends, words of blessing come easy -- but the true measure of a friend is the response you get when you issue the "May Day" signal.
Will they inconvenience themselves to meet you at your point of need? The kind of friend who sees you at your worst, struggling, and speaks blessing and hope over you in faith and love is a precious gem to be treasured. Of course, it also brings up the question: "Am I that kind of friend?"
Lesson #4: Failure softens your heart and keeps you walking in mercy rather than judgment.
Something happens to us when we see our own moral frailty, God's persistent love and we experience his restoring power. We are exposed to the incredible depth of God's mercy -- an unending ocean that constantly threatens to overwhelm our self-focused agendas. His compassion is released in us; a depth of understanding and a foundation of hope that is not mere theory. We have experienced mercy triumphing over judgment and so we are compelled to see life differently.
When we judge someone in their failure, we separate, detach ourselves from them. It requires nothing more of us. But mercy draws us into the lives of those who are hurting to bring restoration, just as we were restored.
I love Jesus' tender restoration of Peter after his great failure (see John 21:15-17). Peter's experience then qualifies him to receive the command: "Feed my lambs....Give to others, Peter, what I've just given you".
"When he was still a long way off, his father saw him. His heart pounding, he ran out, embraced him, and kissed him.
Let me end with quoting Luke 15:20-24 from The Message:
"When he was still a long way off, his father saw him. His heart pounding, he ran out, embraced him, and kissed him.
The son started his speech: 'Father, I've sinned against God, I've sinned before you; I don't deserve to be called your son ever again.'
But the father wasn't listening. He was calling to the servants, 'Quick. Bring a clean set of clothes and dress him. Put the family ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Then get a grain-fed heifer and roast it. We're going to feast! We're going to have a wonderful time! My son is here—given up for dead and now alive! Given up for lost and now found!' And they began to have a wonderful time. "
