Do you have an orphan heart?
We are a planet of orphans; each of us was born with an orphan heart. We were not born into this world with a intuitive connection, a consciousness of our Heavenly Father, the God who created us and loves us with an incomparable, inexhaustible love.
Daddy God, Orphan Heart
A central truth that Jesus brought to the world was that God is “our Heavenly Father”, filled with great longing to reconcile us to himself. It is not enough for God that we be forgiven – he desires that we receive the Spirit of Adoption and so be restored into full sonship, and relate to him as “Abba” (Galatians 4:6; Romans 8:15).
This word does not refer to the formal “title” of a father, but the tender, intimate name that probably best translates to “Daddy”, “Papa” or “Dad” in our modern context. Salvation is the restoration of both “sonship rights” and “sonship intimacy” – and he desires us to experience this right now, in this life.
Though we receive Christ and in him the power to become the children of God, we can persist in “orphan thinking”. In our hearts, we have not fully embraced our place in the family of God. We are sons who still live out of an orphan heart.
In our hearts, we have not fully embraced our place in the family of God. We are sons who still live out of an orphan heart.
In Luke 15, Jesus teaches us about God’s Father heart through an elaborate parable or example story. Here we see two sons with orphan hearts – one who openly rejected his father and another who never fully embraced the fullness of his love.
Fruits of an orphan mindset
Instead of walking through the story, I will simply list some of the fruits of an orphan heart. All or some of these symptoms you may recognize in your self-conception, as I do in mine:
1. We struggle to believe that God is committed to satisfying our hearts deeply.
It is one thing to trust in God’s care and provision for ‘the basics’, but are we fully convinced he will give us our “dream life”? Instead of joyful, hope-filled submission, we struggle with feelings of impatience, feeling “left behind”, dreaming about another life than the one we are in. We feel stuck and stifled where we are at. I am not suggesting that life will go exactly how we envision it – but I am saying that God promises to satisfy our hearts richly with his goodness and mercy.
2. We give ourselves over to sin to compensate for feelings of dissatisfaction.
“Sin is what you do when your heart is not satisfied with God” (John Piper, Future Grace). The son felt stuck and stifled in hopeless dissatisfaction under his father’s care, so when he sought “freedom” he did not live a quiet and contented life! No, he “compensated” by reckless living – giving himself over to the pleasure/pain of sin. We all stumble and sin but it is normal to quickly return to the Father. It is when we somehow “pay back” ourselves in yielding to envy, anger, despair or lust we can see the orphan spirit in us.
3. Our repentance is defiled with thoughts of punishment, loss and unworthiness.
Let me offend you by saying this: “A true son is a cheerful sinner”. I am probably overstating myself, but only just a little! A true son will stumble, stop, say “Oh crap, Dad! I messed up. Sorry!” and clamber back into his Daddy’s lap.
A son repents quickly and is restored completely. A orphan mindset expects punishment where there is none; it assumes sin or failure results in permanent loss with no hope of restoration; and it resists God’s extravagant love the moment we turn to him.
How long will you walk under that dark cloud? The Father restored the errant son before he was cleaned up, before he could complete his well-prepared supplication! Could it be that God wants us back in his arms more than we want to be back with him? He thinks restoration is way more glorious than punishment!
4. We labor under a performance mentality.
The older son was an account-keeper. He felt his service should be rewarded at least modestly. You may feel that your performance does not merit any blessing or more blessing from God – but the issue is that we are constantly evaluating ourselves and others. Who works harder? Who is more faithful? Who is more committed? Who is more passionate? Who is more loving and accepting? It comes down to: Who is better? The problem with account-keeping is that in God’s eyes, all accounts have been closed already and marked “Paid in Full”! He relates to us purely out of grace because of the Cross. This mentality is another manifestation of the orphan heart.
5. We struggle to enter into God’s celebration of his sons.
What do you feel about someone like Todd Bentley? Is our envy of his gifting matched by our satisfaction that he fell into shame? Are we angered to think that he is now “claiming” to be restored and ready to minister again? If we can’t enter into heaven’s party mentality for others, it is likely that we never entered into the party God threw for us when we were restored to him! Dude, did you even go to your own party? Maybe we first need to go to God’s greatest party; the one he threw when his First Son, Jesus, perfectly obeyed him and came to sit at his right hand. Actually, I think that party is still going strong, and it may never end! I suspect heaven is way more joyful and jubilant that we imagine. The orphan spirit is a religious, judgmental, self-focused spirit. The spirit of adoption is a party spirit that dances and feasts freely and joyfully. Do you get it? He delights in you and is always ready to throw a party for you! You can even throw your own party -- anytime you want!
6. We struggle to believe in the overwhelming goodness and generosity of God.
To enjoy what you have, you must truly believe that it is yours to take. God would say to us “Son, you are always with me, and all that is mine is yours”. Do we really believe we have free access both to him and to his gifts? That is outrageous! I think we live more conscious of our failings and inadequacies than of God’s unmerited and extravagant love.
An Adopted Heart
So what does an adopted heart look like?
- A heart that knows that God is committed to fully satisfy it’s deepest desires
- A heart that embraces joyful, hope-filled submission to God
- A heart that repents quickly and embraces God’s restoration fully
- A heart that is enjoying intimacy, not evaluating who is better than whom
- A heart that enters into God’s celebration of his sons
- A heart that expects and enjoys intimacy and favor with God
Prayer:
“God I am your beloved Son and you are so much more generous and compassionate that I can ever imagine. You love to restore me and freely give me all things.
Help me truly embrace the rights and intimacies that are mine through Sonship in Christ. I want to walk with you and fully enjoy my inheritance in Christ. Amen”.
